A Musing... and Conversations within a Marriage

My marriage is strong. My husband and I converse openly about everything. We joke togther, etc. He loves to say things to see my reactions, as I do back with him as well. Normally, I don't share any conversations or personal details about my marriage. However, this is the exception. This is an honest to goodness conversation that took place in our household today.

I was getting ready to walk out the door and head to the grocery store. My dear husband, Ricardo was downstairs with me. We had just finished adding any last minute items needing purchased to the list. Then, he announces this:

Ricardo: I have made up my New Year's Resolutions.

Me: Good for you!

Ricardo: I've decided I'm going to lose weight and have sex a minimum of 3 times a week.

Me: ...giggling...

Ricardo: Baby! I've come to you first with this proposition.

Me: I support you baby! Look, I'm going to the store to buy you Lean Cuisines as we speak.

Ricardo: Baby! What about the other? You're not gonna make me outsource are you?!

Me: (laughing and pushing him away as I head out the door) Baby, talk to the hand! (no pun intended;) I'll be back.

End of conversation.

So I'm at the store replaying THAT conversation in my mind. When, THIS conversation we had 2 weeks ago pops back into my head. Ricardo and a friend went to a certain eating establishment where they have hot waitresses and good wings. Upon returning home, Ricardo told me about his luncheon.

He said the waitress flirted (shamelessly) with them. She sat d0wn beside him when they placed their order and touched his leg with her hand . Then she kept putting her hand on his friend repeatedly every time she came to the table. Ricardo, SAID he scooted over when she touched him; to convey he wasn't interested. Said friend, supposedly loved the attention lavished upon him. Ricardo asked my opinion on this matter.

I responded by saying: That I cannot judge the actions of anyone. I was not there. Had I been there, I guarantee that waitress would not have been touching MY husband. That she was probably just doing it to earn a bigger tip. As for me, I just try to conduct myself in a manner that shows respect for myself, my husband and our marriage. And THAT is all that I can control.

NOW I'm wondering if one conversation has anything to do with the other? Was I too quick to dismiss the restaurant thing? Is my husband doing the whole diet, get in shape, for unknown reasons?

And "outsourcing?" What does he mean exactly?! The possibilities and punchlines are endless for a mind like mine. For instance, WHERE does one go exactly to outsource? The most logical answer: Thailand of course. (I'm thinking Bangkok.) But, then my husband doesn't have the time or money to travel abroad. So does that mean a foreign dignitary will be coming to live with us? Some 21 year old exchange student perhaps? Or is he considering "buying American?" (um...so to speak.)

All this in my head AND grocery shopping too. (Can I multi-task or what?!) I love my husband. I trust my husband. Life is good. I am not willing to taking any chances when it comes to my marriage however. So tonight, I will be taking my dear friend Ima's advice. I will be putting on my Mamma Mia boots and showing my husband why there is no need for "outsourcing." I will be supportive of his resolutions (as OUTLANDISH as they may be!) Get ready Ricardo...you asked for it! I'm about to show you why it is best to not cross union lines.

And if THAT doesn't work. Tomorrow I will be taking my dear friend, Tracy's advice. I will log on to Pioneer Womans site. Download her "calf nut" recipe and serve it up for dinner. She thinks this will get the message across loud and clear what would happen if he were to seriously consider "outsourcing". That Tracy, always good for a laugh!