Anybody want to take a guess as to what it is? Anybody? Buehler?Take a guess and then sing along to the latest song that I have composed in it's honor. (*note: sing to the tune of Sesame Streets "One of these things is kinda different song"*)
One of these arms is kinda different.
One of my arms just doesn't belong.
The phlebotomist didn't know what she was doing,
she drew my blood all kinds of wrong.
... now my song is done.
Wait!...
I want to beat her ass.
Yeah, NOW my song is done. :)
WHO in the name of all that is good and decent, let this inept woman quit practicing on oranges and start amputating innocent humanbeings???! 3 pricks and a bruise this size is telling me that PERHAPS, just MAYBE, this isn't her calling!
PERHAPS, just MAYBE she should find a different line of work.
I say this with the utmost respect, but...I would honestly rather have a strung-out, heroin addict draw my blood next time, at least they will know how to hit a friggin vein!!!!!
Octay Leevay!!!
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9 comments:
I believe the correct terminology for someone who attempts to draw blood but errors is called a PhlebotoMISS! or perhaps more correctly a FLUB-oto-MISS Haaaaaaa! Haaaa!
Here's to Keeping your sense of humor,
Ima Jo King
Wanna know something scary?
There is NO formal training required to be a phlebotomist! At least in Kansas, anyway.
Last time I went to my family doc for a routine physical, the phlebo was brand spanking new. (She was a bus driver prior to her career change.) Anyway, she missed once and apologized profusely - I told her to keep poking me until she got it and felt comfy about it. She got me on the 3rd try. I would rather her poke me over and over and get more confidence, than poke a kid or an elderly person with fragile veins.
I learned how to draw blood in 1992 on a comatose patient who had to have lab drawn every 6 hours. I'll never forget her. :) She paved the way for my needle prowess!
But I do agree with you completely - your arm looks terrible and the person drawing your blood should have stopped after being unsuccessful the first time and found someone more skilled!
If you don't volunteer to be their pin cushion, they shouldn't keep abusing you!
I work with a nurse who has a 50%, 1st attempt, IV insertion rate. Those are sucky odds, if you ask me. Drives me nuts that our patients are stuck unnecessarily!
Also, meant to tell you....
Mom finished The BronzeHorseman yesterday. She said she was a MESS when she finished it. She wished the story would go on and on forever, or that at least there would be a sequel. :)
Thanks again for sharing such a beautiful, amazing love story.
As soon as I get it back from my mama, I am going to pass it on to Kiki.
I'm 36 and every year I think I really need to get over my fear of Dr. offices and needles. I'm okay with my fear now. Ouch
Holy Crappers Batman! No formal training?! I shoulda known. Next time I'll draw my own doggone blood. I couldn't do any worse. ;)
Here's some lovely, wonderful, yet scarey news....
There IS a sequel. 2 in fact. The second part is "Tatiana and Alexander" and the 3rd installment is "The Summer Garden".
Lovely that the story continues. Wonderful to get to immerse ourselves in their lives again. And scarey, because EVERYTHING gets put on the back burner once one picks up Paulina's books. LOL! :O I'm sorry, she's just that good! I'm reading The Bronze Horseman again now, for the 4th time. I just love it so much, I read it over and over...
I just checked, and NO it isn't listed on the cover/ Author page. I thought it said something about the sequels. I feel like such an ass! It must have been listed on the book club page or amazon somewhere instead. I'm TRULY sorry!!! I should have said something, it just didn't even click til you said your mom wished there was a sequel. Now I feel like a big ol pile of shit. Sorry!!!! I hope the good (albeit late) news of a sequel will compel you to forgive my denseness!
P.S. the sequels are every bit as many pages as the 1st edition. So clear your calendar/schedule. :)
Happy Reading!!!
Stacy, within 20 seconds of reading that there are 2 more books, I ordered them from Amazon. They are on their way!
Thank you! I am SO excited!!!!
Your arms look horrid!
I used to get on them when my mom didn't yet have her port. If they couldn't get it once I'd make them find someone else.
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