3 Prefixes I can do without...

I had my hair done on Saturday. (Love it!!!) While the color was processing my stylist left to run an errand. As I sat there with eyes closed in relaxation mode, I heard a snippet of a conversation from the stylist and client next to me.

Client: Do you have any brothers or sisters?
Stylist: Yes. I have one brother and one 1/2 brother.

The comment has stuck with me for the past 48 hours. I'm not judging his comment. I'm just curious as to why he feels the need to specify. I really wished I could have gotten him alone for a moment and asked. Why? Do you think your heritage is more important, or less? Do you not like your other brother so you feel the need to qualify it with the 1/2 prefix? Or have you been raised with that prefix, so it comes naturally to you?

I hear it often. "Step sibling." "Half sibling" "Adopted Child." I really would like for someone to answer the question "Why?" Why do you feel the need to specify the exact nature of your relationship?

I guess I'm more than merely curious, I'm a part of the equation. I myself am a "half." A "non biological." It bothers me. Immensely. I was raised with the comment of not "really" being someone's daughter. It would come at me from out of the blue. I would be in public and be introduced as "Stacy so and so." Then came the qualifier: "You know she's not really his, she's REALLY so and so's daughter." Really??? Really?!!!

I even heard it from my own mother more than once. Whenever it was convenient for her, (like after they divorced and I repeatedly asked to go live with my Dad after she remarried) she made sure that I knew "He's not even your REAL father!" Really??? Really??!!!

Another example, my middle sister (upon getting angry with me one day) announcing, "You're not even my real sister! Your just my 1/2 sister!" Really??? Really???

I don't consider my sisters, "half sisters." I never have. I never will. I don't "gel well" with aforementioned middle sister. But, I would never consider her my 1/2 sister. She is my sister plain and simple. If in need, I would still give her an organ, etc. As for my youngest sister? I know for a fact that she doesn't qualify me as a half sister. Nor do I condsider her anything other than my sister. Unless I were to say she is also my friend.

I just think that life is hard enough without adding monikers that aren't necessary. Or necessarily kind. Everyone wants to fit in. To be a part of a whole. It doesn't matter "half" "step" "adopted" "biological". What matters is love. If you put time, effort and love into raising a child, they're yours. End of story. Think about someone else's feelings before you apply a prefix to someone's situation. And if you need to qualify that someone is a "half, adopted, or step" than perhaps you should look deeply inside yourself and ask why exactly that is. Maybe there is something lacking in YOU not the other way around.

I admire Jada Pinkett Smith for coining the term "bonus child." She gets it. She truly understands. There really shouldn't be any step, half or adopted...only bonus. I feel so blessed and so grateful for my family. My Dad, my sister. My wonderful husband and sons. I also feel blessed to have "bonus" family in my life. People that don't have DNA that matches mine, but who the word friend just doesn't seem adequate enough. People who love and care for me as much as I do them. People who accept. People go to the mat for each other time and time again.

So lets do away with half, step and adopted. Let's add words like bonus family, chosen family, etc. It might just make a huge difference to someone. It would also be the start of making the world a much kinder, more accepting place.

Behold...My Grasshopper

It is no surprise to anyone who knows me, how much I love my boys. My love for them is so immense, it is immeasurable by current standards.

It is also no surprise to anyone who has ever met my boys, how different they both are in personalities. Both are wonderful, kind, beautiful, and lovely little individuals. That being said however...I must mention that they are indeed INDIVIDUALS. For example, ONE abides by rules and regulations. Never tries to push the envelope. Not even a smidgen. He is a model citizen. A poster child for good behavior. I admire and respect him immensely. He has achieved what has always remained elusive to me.

The OTHER ONE is another matter entirely. He LIVES to shock, amuse, and entertain. It is a desire in his soul too stong too be denied A sense of humor, too large to be contained. He has bent the envelope so far apart, that the aforementioned rules have come flying out and scattered upon the floor. Upon which, he just looks at them, shakes his head, and giggles at so absurd an idea as rules. Sadly, I identify with this pint sized rebel all too well. I have seen my past become my future...and it scares me. More than just a little.

Here is just the latest example of Brown Eyes' wacky sense of humor and compelling desire to shock people:

Yesterday, he announced: "I have to go potty." He giggled, grabbed the camera and headed for the bathroom.

Upon seeing this I said: "Brown Eyes, what are you doing???"

He replies (laughing hysterically): "I'm going to video myself going to the bathroom."

To which I reply: "Brown Eyes! Some things are private."

Still laughing, he says with attitude (and I quote): "And obviously, SOME things are not."
Then.... he SLAMS the bathroom door in my face.

Much laughter (on both sides of the door) and a few minutes later, he emerges. Proudly displaying this self portrait:

The image is Shocking, Funny, Breaks all the rules of Propriety, While still managing to be impossibly cute.

I couldn't be more proud!!! :)

Much love and admiration Grasshopper!

The Ironies of Life...

Life...it's always something isn't it???!!! I'm thinking of making a new and improved board game with some of the ditzy real life scenarios that occur in my everyday "Murphy's Law" existence. My whole life seems to involve doing or saying one inane, dorky thing after another. In fact, I can't tell you how many times my hubby Ricardo has uttered these words: "That's alright Stac, you just sit there and look pretty!" Too many times to count that's for sure.


Here's an example of a little scenario that happened to me this morning...



Woke up. Fed dogs. Got coffee. Logged on laptop to check e-mails. Had 23 awaiting me. 3 from my bank (never a good sign). ALL of them overdraft notices/fraud alerts. (An even worse sign!) I have 3 overdrafts so far today-and it is only 7:30am. I'm getting the impression I should just go back to bed and call it a day. With all the overdraft charges I have already incurred, it is really the smartest, most economical thing I can do at this point. Don't you agree??!!



I paid all my bills on the 1st, like I always do. Notified hubby-all the bills are paid. However, it is going to be tight until next payday. We MUST not do anything foolish. Watch our P's and Q's. Be frugal. etc. Ricardo suggested transferring money from our savings account at one bank over to our checking account at yet another bank to tide us over. Sounded like a good idea at the time.



Only, imagine my surprise this morning...when instead of depositing money into my checking account...it WITHDREW money FROM my checking account. Money that wasn't in there to begin with. Yeah, it's all chuckles at this point. Chuckles and overdraft fees.



I notified dear sweet husband Ricardo of the mistake. He went down to our local bank with the checking account, notified them what happened. Reversed the transaction. And had them waive the fees. (He's very good at that sort of thing.) Now we just have to sit tight for the 48 hours it takes to have the money moved from one account to the other. (As our savings account bank is somewhere else entirely.)



I gotta say, Ricardo was none too happy about the situation. Not at all. I tried to explain that it was an innocent mistake. Could have happened to anyone. Nothing to get all flustered or upset about. After all, he's the credit/finance man. Surely, he's seen that kind of thing happen before right?!



I told him I loved him. I also told him not to be too hard on himself. As you see,... he was the one who made the "oopsie" reverse money transfer to begin with, not me..... Life sure can be ironic at times huh?

I will have to ponder upon that little irony a little. Right after I finish sitting here and looking pretty. ;)

Have you ever noticed...

Have you ever noticed how children will inevitably wear white to the dinner table EVERY SINGLE TIME you cook spaghetti or enchiladas??? Or maybe that just happens in my household. Great Googley Moogley!


A HUGE "shout out" ;) and Thank you to who ever it is that invented Shout Liquid Gel!-I just LOVE YOU for making my life easier!!!

Sometimes it's Hard to Be a Woman...

Yes, sometimes it is hard to be a woman. I know I'm not saying anything new. And it is nothing that every female hasn't had to deal with at one time or another in her lifetime. Whether it be the daily shaving of your legs n pits. The coloring or highlighting of your hair. The facial masks, lotions and acid peels to stave off aging of the face. The PMS, the monthly cycles, or the ultimate in woman hardships-pregnancy and childbirth. It is indeed not always easy to be a woman.









I'm not saying it is easy to be a man either. Don't get me wrong. Ya'll have your hardships as well. But, and here is the big BUT...women love you no matter how you look. You put on a few "lbs."...fine by us. More to love. You lose a little hair...it doesn't faze us. You get gray hair...we think you look more distinguished. ETC. Also, society is a little easier on a man's appearance I do believe. (Please correct me if I am wrong.)









That being said, society does judge a woman's appearance a little more harshly. And women especially will judge other women. Usually not to their face, mind you. But, a "Tsk tsk...I'm so glad I don't have (enter horrible affliction of your choice here) like so and so...."









Today, I took the bull by the horns so to speak. I decided to squelch the whispers. Give people something else to talk about. I dealt with my own latest horrible affliction- (Que scary music here...da da duuuum...)...facial hair. Yep, I admit it- I had it. Since my hysterectomy a few years back, I don't have quite the estrogen I once had. Poor, sad, little, uno remaining ovary can't keep up with the demand I guess. I first started noticing a few downy soft facial hairs popping up above my lip. Then, spreading to my chin. Then my cheeks... Next thing you know, I look like freakin Chewbacca!!! (Well, except for the height difference. But I digress.)









So, today I took a few "me moments" and opened up a "Moom Hair Removal Wax Strip Kit" I had ordered. Before I go any further, let me say these little all natural oil strips REALLY do work. Now, let me tell you HOW they work...









You gently warm up the strip between your hands. Alright. I figure, if a little warming is good-really warm is better. So I took it to the next level. I held my little strip right up to my electric fireplace. Yep, made it niiiiice n toasty! Then I applied it to my face per instructions. But I'm not stupid. I applied ALL the strips at once. I didn't want to do just one strip at a time and wuss out if it was too gawd awful painful. (Yep, I'm a thinker I am! :)









Next, I waited for the wax to cool a little. Wanted to make sure I got all those little hairs attached to it. Like they say in the military...Leave no soldiers behind. No sir ee!









Then, I ripped those little suckers off as hard and quick as I could. No gentle removal of the band aid here. We are talking lightening speed.









Let me tell you what it sounded like: Deep breath, RRRRRiiiPPPP, ...YIPE!!!...followed by hysterical laughter. Yeah, cause I had like 5 more to go you see. It was all shits n giggles for about 3 minutes there. No pain-No gain Baby!









But now, WOW!!! My face is as smooth and soft as a baby's butt. It also has red stripes where it looks like I took a belt to my face. But I'm sure the soothing chamomile oils (or whatever they are) will calm that down in no time at all....Like a day or two.



In the meantime, I am enjoying this new improved(?) hair free face of mine. Now, if I could just quit giggling and humming...."Sometimes it's hard to be a woman...."

Not yet a Man Cave

Every guy should have a place to get away.

A place where they can be loud.

Boisterous.

Where they can jump up and down to their hearts content.



On cold, wet days like this,

Our garage is converted into-



A Not Yet a Man Cave....

BYOB-Bring your own bounce! It's a hit with this 13 and under crowd!

Happy Birthday Ricardo!!!

You gave me your name.
And two wonderful boys.
You can give me a headache.
You bring me countless joys.

We've been together for 23 years.
We've shared much laughter,
and cried a few tears.


Sometimes you make me crazy mad.
But life without you,
Would be rather sad.

So on this, your special day.
Please note,
I'd have it no other way.

Than to spend the rest of my life with you.
In good times, in bad times.
In all that you do.

For I love you so much,
Sometimes it hurts.
Which reminds me...your present.
You're recieving "Life Alert!" ;O

Today's forcast is certainly interesting....











We have rain puddles. A few feet over, we have ice crystals...And right next to that we have snow flurries....

I don't know what the technical term for it is. And by the time I figure it out, it will have melted. Meanwhile, the boys want to know if this qualifies as a snow day! :0

4 Day Weekend

Did everyone have a lovely Thanksgiving? Did you take advantage of the long weekend and relax? Face the frantic mobs and go shopping? Trudge down to the basement or up to the attics and sort through all the boxes trying to find your holiday decorations?



We had a busy weekend around here. Thanksgiving weekend is always a little frantic. We have children you see. They think that as soon as the Thanksgiving meal is over, we should IMMEDIATELY start bringing out all the Christmas decorations. I on the other hand, believe that we should take advantage of the of the 4 days to get some much needed miscellaneous home improvement project(s) done. While Ricardo, believes that the 4 day weekend should involve football and fishing. Sooooo, that is what we did.



Friday we set up all the outside Christmas decorations and lights.



These lovely snowman siblings are outside our front door waiting to greet you upon your arrival. Aren't they just all kinds of cute?! Ignore the present in front of them. I needed something heavy to keep them from toppling over if it got really windy. I placed some bricks in a box, wrapped it, and placed it in front of them. Ricardo laughed and said someone would probably take the gift. I said, the wrapping job is so hideous that they wouldn't look twice at it. HA! I can't wrap gifts to save my life. Missed out on the "beautiful wrapping gene" entirely. It's sad really. Almost tragic. But I digress....



We also got all the Christmas lights up.



Some people prefer clear lights. While others prefer multi-colored lights. Which type are you? I always think that clear lights look so elegant, while multi-color lights look so festive and fun. As you can see, we are in "multi-color mode" around here. Purdy-Purdy don't you think?



But what are lights without an inflatable???!!!

Or a little "yard art?"

Check out the little pup at the back of the sled howling. He makes me laugh.

Alright, so that was our Friday.....On Saturday, we transitioned from outdoor lighting, to outdoor landscaping.

Our poolside was a mess I tell you. All the grass was growing up in between our trees and shrubs, choking them out. We had those recycled tire tree rings around all of them. They were supposed to keep grass from growing up and around your plantings, while keeping them hydrated at the same time. Notice I said SUPPOSED to. In reality...Not so much. So, ripped up each one and placed edging and mulch around our landscape.

But before we did that, we had to put down weedscreen to keep the grass from growing through. Yards and yards of weedscreen. With cutouts around each individual plant. It was quite the chore.

We had to do this on both sides of the pool.

But don't you think that a little mulch can really make an area look nice?

And that A LOT of mulch can make it look even better??? :) *Note* -The grass left behind the bed here was not from laziness by the installers. We had to leave it alone for drainage purposes. Ugly, but necessary. Thank you-Mgt.**

In between these projects, Ricardo managed to watch 3-4 football games and go fishing twice.

Which leads us up to Sunday evening. We then decorated the inside of the house. Stockings were hung. Garland was strung. And trees were .....

well, what ever it is that you do with trees. "Put up?" Makes it sound like you are putting them away? "Assembled?" Makes it sound like you made it yourself. Oh I don't know what the proper term is. Just leave it at- "We put the flocking tree up." Hee Hee. Yep, still tickled by the word "flock" in all it's forms. I know, its "flocked up"...but some things will never change. ;)

Which leads us to Monday morning. I will say, there is nothing quite like a 4 day weekend to make your husband question WHY he married such a goal oriented, gotta get it done gal. On the bright side, after a 4 day weekend-he was more than ready to go back to work...so he could rest. HA!

I am now off to our regularly scheduled scholastic and housework program. No rest for the wicked. Yep, I'm a busy, busy gal! Guess you could say "I'm flocking busy"....if you were the immature, almost juvenile, laugh at anything type of person. ;)

Hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving Weekend! Now, bring on Christmas!!!