An Air Conditioning Story

Let me tell you another true story. At some point during this tale, you may think I am once again pulling your leg. Those of you that know Ricardo and I will consider the source. Thereby, concurring that it is indeed true.



This is a story about a married couple who have central air. The air conditioning works hard every summer. Running practically nonstop. Poor little a/c unit. Poor married couple with the astronomical utility bill... But I digress.



The a/c unit has a "control center" in the attic. The "control center has venting that runs air throughout the house, as well as pvc pipes that capture water and drain it into a drain pan and outside in case of a backup. Since the a/c unit works so hard, it gets sludge build-up from time to time. This sludge buildup backs up the drain and interferes with the unit itself working correctly. Are you with me so far? Getting bored with this story? (Please hang on a little longer.)



Two summers ago, the a/c unit backed up and needed a repairman. It cost the couple several hundred dollars. The repairman suggested running bleach down the pvc pipe on a monthly basis to keep the sludge buildup from returning. The couple TRY to remember to do this monthly maintenance. However, sometimes they forget and the problem returns. Also, the bleach smells terrible and vents throughout the entire house after using it. It burns the delicate little lungs of those who reside in the house. So......



The wife came up with an alternative idea. A greener idea. One that would remove sludge and not damage lung tissue. Why not use baking soda and vinegar instead? You pour baking soda in the pipe, add vinegar and wait for the chemical reaction to dissolve away the sludge. Works on sinks and tubs like a charm. Husband thought this was worth a try.



Wife said to Ricardo...I mean husband, here is a box of baking soda and here is a gallon of vinegar. I imagine it will take the whole box of soda to clear out all the sludge. ( Now THIS is where communication is VERY important. English is a tricky language. Sometimes you may be thinking one thing and not express it EXACTLY as you intended.) Stacy...um wife, MEANT to add a little baking soda at a time in the pipe, followed by some vinegar, repeat process as necessary until all soda and sludge was gone. Husband HEARD-use entire box AT ONCE in pipe. How many of you are laughing at this point in the story?



Needless to say, entire box of baking soda used at once was not a good idea. The pipe has a "u" shaped neck in it. Baking soda filled entire pipe and got clogged up around and past the "u" portion of pipe. Vinegar just fizzled and overflowed all over the place. Pipe was truly clogged at this point.



Husband and wife both climbed up in the attic taking turns trying to unclog the friggin' pipe. Why take turns you ask? Well first of all this is a partnership. Secondly, it was my bright idea. Thirdly, the attic was hotter than hades on a cloudy day!!! AT LEAST 130* I am sure. Sweat POURING (not dripping) off of body. Neither one of us could take the heat for too long without feeling dizzy. I tried to convince Ricardo it was almost like spending time at an expensive spa. We were getting the toxins out of our body with our own private sauna steam room....He wasn't buying that analogy...at all. Then I suggested perhaps we were getting an early viewing of the afterlife. Whew! It's gonna be hot down there!!! :)



It took a long ass time to clean out all the soda from that pipe. Hours. It took time, patience, a coat hanger jammed into the pipe, and many attempts to add vinegar before the problem was resolved. In the end, the pipe was unsludged. The married couple lost a couple of unneeded "lbs." and resolved to live the good life so they wouldn't have to worry about the afterlife. They had a glimpse of it, and it wasn't pretty...or comfortable.



I guess the moral(s) of this story are, Alternative ideas are worth a try. Green IS good. Partnership is commendable. But perhaps most importantly- you should say EXACTLY what you mean. LEAVE NOTHING to interpretation. Because while English can be tricky.... miscommunication, well.....it's priceless!!!

A Wedding Story

You've got to love the irony. On Independence Day 15 years ago, Ricardo and I committed ourselves to each other.

I for one, have always considered 4th of July to be the most romantic day of the year. Sitting in the dark, snuggled next to your significant other, watching beautiful fireworks overhead.....yep, sure smacks of romance to me. But now, back to the memory...

I still remember it like it was yesterday. We had a noon wedding scheduled. (Some old western enthusiasts may say "High Noon.") We were doing the old quickie wedding on the way to the airport. Before we caught a flight out to Cancun. No guests, just us. Simple. More meaningful as well, I think.


We hired a limo driver to pick us up at our townhouse and take us to the wedding chapel. The Chapel of Love. No, really. It truly was called the Chapel of Love. The officiator was "Dr. Vows."...yes really. I had picked this establishment out of the yellow pages. It was on the way to the airport, and it was cheap. When I called to reserve our day and time, the good doctor advised me it would cost $50. And I could pay it out in installments if I needed to, as long as it was paid off before the big day. Honestly. But we were living large, we threw caution to the wind. We paid for the ceremony all in one lump sum. In advance. Yeah, we're risk takers all right.

It was a beautiful sunny day. The limo was elegant. The driver was kind and fun. He was also navigationally challenged. He took the scenic route to the chapel and got lost. Had to call headquarters for directions. Also, to call the chapel for us...to advise them we would be late. See, 15 years ago, cell phones weren't commonplace in our lives. Things not going exactly as planned...well, that was nothing new.

We were an hour late for our own wedding. Seriously. THANK GOODNESS we didn't have guests. Can you imagine?! For one betrothed person to not show up for the wedding would have been bad. But for both to be AWOL...THAT would have looked downright pathetic, at best.

Luckily, the good doctor waited for us. The Chapel of Love was a little more than a hole in the wall, of a residential neighborhood. Really. It was a tiny house in the middle of a not so nice neighborhood. Okay, it wasn't a neighborhood... exactly. That would seem too upscale and refined. Let's just, for all intent and purposes, call it what it was. A "Hood." And the hole in the wall, most probably from a bullet. There was a car up on blocks across the street. People definitely noticed when we pulled up in a limo. Some people were standing around on the streets. They were obviously "working". I doubt that they reported their income to the IRS,... but I digress. Others peeked out their windows (the ones that weren't covered with tinfoil) as we arrived. Even the limo driver was a little bit nervous. He backed into the driveway, in case we had to make a quick getaway. He may be navigationally challenged; but, he was street smart. And prepared. I'll give him that. Luckily, we didn't need any quick getaways. The wedding went as planned, sort of....

Upon entering the quaint chapel, we were met with an oasis of beauty. Okay,we were met by a few church pews. (Okay, technically they may have just been "wooden benches.") We also found a few mismatched fold out chairs and candles for ambiance. Not pillar candles mind you,... votives. Votives in cups. Yes, romance was in the air alright! There were also a few strands of greenery twisted around an old white plastic arch. Silk greenery. Aged silk greenery. And a podium which the good doctor stood behind for the ceremony. Ahhh yes, this is what $50 will get ya. Character. Memories that linger long after the ceremony is over. Memories that you will never forget. Even if you try.

To say the chapel's decor was the highlight of our wedding experience, would have done a disservice for the actual service itself. We didn't have traditional vows. Nope. Dr. Vows had other plans in store for us. Anyone can pledge to love, honor and obey. In sickness and in health. For better, for worse....til death do ye part. As for us, one of our pledges was "To give you my heart. For I have no use for it." Honest. We also pledged (among other things) to bathe once a year. Whether we felt we needed it or not. ( According to Dr. Vows, so many marriages crumble due to hygiene issues. ) Then he reached his hand into the ceremonial podium, presented us with two travel bars of soap and announced we were man and wife.

Truth is indeed stranger than fiction. Many of you may not believe what you are reading. You may think I'm joking, that's what I do. But I'm serious. You can view it for yourself. We have it all on VHS tape. Our lovely limo driver, taped the unconventional-yet charming ceremony for us. He wasn't a technological whiz, so the first couple of minutes of the ceremony were missing. But, the rest is all there. He even added commentary. And laughter. We all laughed. And laughed. And well, you get the picture.

It is the only wedding I know of, where the bride and groom are laughing through much of the ceremony. We couldn't help it. Each pledge and vow was a little more crazy than the one before. We even had to kiss each other's rings after we placed them on our fingers. ( I now know how the Pope feels.) The good doctor also told us (after he handed us our bars of soap) that he had a good feeling about us. He thought our marriage would be successful.

I don't believe the good doctor ever went to medical school. Perhaps he didn't even attend any Theological classes. I do believe however, that Dr. Vows knew what he spoke of though... In some strange sort of way. Our marriage does indeed seem to be successful. Whether it is due to compatibility, hard work, or good hygiene habits I don't know. Perhaps all. Perhaps none. All I know is, it works. And like our wedding, the marriage has been filled with much laughter.

I also know, that we are truly married. No... I mean legally. We checked that out when we returned from our honeymoon. Wouldn't you?! It was all there. Signed. Sealed. Delivered to the legal registries or such.

15 years later, Ricardo and I still look at each other on occasion and say: "I give you my heart, for I have no use for it." It still brings back memories of that day. The day we lost our Independence, but gained a lot more. And if you ask us, it was one of the best $50 we ever spent. We've gotten a great return on our money. We also wouldn't change a thing about how or where we got married. Okay, perhaps we would change the whole "being an hour late thing." But the truth is, it's not the type of ceremony you have. How large, how small. It's not the location. It's not who is on the guest list. It's the actual marriage that is important. That's what people invest in. Or should. That and soap...or so I'm told.

On that note, Happy Anniversary Ricardo!! I'm glad I gave you my heart. I'm glad you gave me your name. I'm complete because of the two babies we made together. I'm blessed for the life we have together as a couple and as a family. And after all these years, I still see fireworks on our anniversary! I hope there will be many more 4th of July celebrations in our future ! I love you!

Stacy writes a Story

Taking the day off from posting. Sort of. Getting a special post ready for tomorrow. A story actually. A wedding story. Written by yours truly. About a couple very near and dear to me.

So tune in tomorrow. Have yourself a drink and snacks handy. For those of you with incontinence issues, put on your Depends. Having tissues handy is optional. But either way....You won't want to miss it!

Life Saving Enchilada

The boys and I just spent 3 hours swimming in the pool today. Finally came in due to heat and hunger. Heat-102. Hunger-INTENSE!!!

What is it about swimming that causes you to go from fine to stark raving mad hungry in a split second??!! We were all a little weak in the knees and shaky. Barely able to wrap the towels around us and stumble towards the door. Almost too weak to turn the knob. Was only the force of us all tumbling upon each other that propelled the door open.

Threw last nights left over enchiladas and rice in the microwave. Was the longest 1 1/2 minute of waiting time I can ever remember! We sat in wet swimsuits and towels. Water dripping on the floor. Wrinkly fingers grabbing on to eating utensils with all our might. Couldn't shovel it in fast enough. Manners be damned. Need for sustenance too great.

Happy to report we are all much better now. But it was a close call. Too close. I think those enchiladas may have saved our lives!!! Ah, the power of cheese!

Me thinks perhaps I should have taken Drama in High School....who knows what it could have led to???!!!

And Now for the Farm Animal Pics

Yesterday, we viewed the farm buildings.

Today, it's all about the animals baby!

There were animals of all shapes, sorts and sizes.

We had large majestic animals:



And wee little ones, who were a bit camera shy:




Some you could pet and feed. Others, not so much. Upon seeing this sign, instead of thinking "I shouldn't feed these animals, I thought: "I should hang this sign around my neck!" Lol!



But, I digress. The above sign was posted outside of this pen.

How beautiful is this guy? I didn't feed him. I was too busy admiring his beauty. So much so, I wanted to arrange for the inheritance of his hide after his timely demise. " Mr. Steer Clear of Me, may I have your coat when you no longer need it? It would look lovely upon my bedroom floor. Thank you kind sir."... Oh quit "poo-pooing" me Kiki! I need me some rawhide!!! ;)

Next we came upon the Alcatraz portion of the farm.




This place was wired up tight. I don't know what this cute little fella could have possibly done. But being a male, it's a given he probably acted like "an ass" at one time or another. :D





He was begging to be petted. But not allowed. Perhaps he tried to take off an appendage at one time. But I think he is remorseful....yet, perhaps not to be trusted.


Another "beauty" was Tom. I'd never seen a turkey so large before.

The ones on my table are much smaller. And not nearly as beautiful. I would have to pardon this guy too. Long may you live Senor Tom.
(That's the little woman standing in front of him. She didn't want me getting too close to her man. :)
Now we have come to the feeding portion of our program. This is the part that all children (and animals) love the most of any farm visit. Allow me to introduce you to our hungry little friends:



What is it about farm animals that the public can feed? They act like they are raving mad with hunger. They are all pushing and climbing up the fence (and over each other) to get a morsel of feed. When we were there, so were about 50 other people-all with feed. So, I seriously doubt they were starving. Yet, I too have known hunger-so who am I to judge when enough is enough.


Some of these fellas were so cute we named them. Okay, I named them. Below is little "Fu Man Chew" Notice his beard.

He was quite serious about his meal.

And this little guy, I named Mr. Soprano. Don't even THINK about not feeding him!!!

He meant business. I think he would have taken out a hit on me, if I failed to share the oats with him. I shared. No worries. Much laughter, but no worries.

The next guy I have given the moniker of Princess Leia. The wrong gender for such a name, but fitting none the less. Don't you agree?



The last shot, is of pigeons. I don't like pigeons really. But these two were hanging around the feeding pens. They just walked around, unafraid of everyone, looking for food. I thought they looked like an old married couple. I don't know if they were from around these parts, or if they too were tourists at the farm. Perhaps they just flew in for dinner.

The Early Bird special I'll bet!!!

:D........

Touring the Farm

We toured an old farm recently. This farm belongs to a very well known family that makes sausage. These barns are exactly how you would picture a barn to look in your mind-yet, rarely how a barn looks in actuality. At least not any that I've seen before. But then, I don't get out much. :) The farm itself is open for the public to tour. Your admission includes roaming the grounds, feeding the animals and admission to the museum. In the background is the facility where they make aforementioned sausage. The public is not allowed in there. (Although I think it would be cool to see how sausage is made. Oh, not the slaughtering part-the assembly line/packaging part.) This pond was on the property. It had horses grazing around it, ducks floating upon it-very peaceful. All my husband could think about was what type of fish might be IN it. :) Everyone loved the hayride. The lovely man who drove the tractor reminded me of my Dad. It made me a wee bit homesick. It was ALL I could do not to hug his neck....but luckily, my family was spared me humiliating them....barely. However, I may just go back again one day to see him. I'll take my sister. She too will see the resemblance-and we will hug the heck out of him. Maybe he will have daughters, so he will understand.



The farm also had the old family homestead. No touring was allowed. However, I would have loved to see the inside. To see how the family lived once upon a time. To go back in time so to speak. But, I had to make due with viewing it from the outside-at a distance. Doesn't it look quaint though? I loved everything about it. Right down to the white picket fence.

The following shots are of the museum.

This one is set up like an old fashioned store.

They had rooms set up like old fashioned kitchens and barns as well.

The picture below reminds me once again of my Dad. He used to have a scale set up like this in his store once upon a time to weigh meat on.

I was once again consumed by an overwhelming urge to go outside and hug the tractor driver. But I'll be visiting my Dad again soon; after which, complete strangers (that in my mind's eye resemble him) will be safe from aforementioned wacko woman accosting them .....for a little while at least.

Tomorrow I will share all the farm animal pictures. But for today, I just wanted you to see the actual farm. And now for what I think is the coolest part. Okay, one of the coolest parts. Aside from the cute picturesque barns, the relaxing pond, the historical museum and family homestead, and the father look alike.

One of the coolest things is this:

This country farm is now smack dab in the middle of a very commercial area. 6 lanes of traffic, businesses as far as the eye can see, rush hour traffic galore-and right across the street...an oasis of calm and yesteryear.


I loved the juxtaposition between yesterday and today's world. Which one would you prefer to reside in?

Come on Baby, " Do the locomotion..."

While on summer vacation, we revisited the good ol' days. We went to see how people used to commute by rail. Have you ever wondered what the inside of one of these old cars looked like? Well wonder no more. This particular car was run on electricity. It transported mail as well as passengers. Oh so roomy inside no?

In the back was the "post office."

Here they sorted the day's mail, like so:

Up front was ,what I am assuming, "first class" seating.

In the middle, standing room only. Stand up, grab a bar, and hold the heck on! But aren't the old advertisements great? And look how tiny the baggage compartments are. For businessmen with teeny, tiny briefcases. :) Teeny, tiny briefcases, hmmmm, I wonder- is that how the term "small businesses" came about?

I think I would prefer to be in the middle of the train. I would much rather stand and hold on, than sit and watch the conductor drive the train.

This is all the equipment necessary to drive a train???!!! Seriously???!!! Where's the radio? Heated seats? GPS? Oh wait. We're on a track, guess we can't really wonder off course now can we. Just the same, I think I 'd rather walk.




And for the love of Mike, don't even get me started on the "facilities." Drink from this fountain? I'd rather stay parched, thank you.





Ohhhhh, and the commode....

It sits like 4 inches off the floor. The sign says, "Please do not use the toilet while train is in the station." No worries! Sweet mother of pearl, I'm glad we progressed in our transportation since then.

Still, it was great seeing how people used to commute. Everyone had a good time exploring history.

And it made for some great photo ops:

Just look at these guys" holding up the train." Get it, holding up the train...:) My Uncle Dennie would have liked that joke. Ahem, anyways...

Sure looks like somebody has been eating their veggies!!!

Sit a Spell

Forrest Gump has forever ruined the way I view park benches. I can no longer see a comfortable spot to sit and rest. All I can think of now when I see a park bench is the phrase, "Life is like a box of chocolates." Aaaaggghhhh!!! Luckily, my boys have never seen that horrible, horrible, need 3 boxes of tissue and hours of therapy, scar you for life movie. So, park benches don't affect them. Obviously, they don't have issues...but, I digress. They found this one quite comfy. We were awaiting our turn for one of the nearby attractions.

We had a few minutes (or twenty) to wait. Wouldn't you love to know the thoughts that they were contemplating?

Me too!

Let Summer Begin!!!

We FINALLY finished up with this year's school work. Can I get a HALLELUJAH??!!! Or at the very least a YEEHAW???!!!

This year was an interesting year teaching two children instead of just one. But we all survived and learned alot in the process. I learned that I need to have more alcoholic beverages on hand. Purely for teaching the youngest mathematics...If Mommy has 6 beers and drinks 1, how many are left? LOL! Just joking.

It will be a shorter summer than usual, due to us running 3 weeks late with our schooling.(flu days, field trips, etc.) I will be adjusting schedules for next year accordingly. I found it takes a little longer when teaching two children separately. However, if all goes well-we will finish up school next year in May!!

Big Changes are coming. Next year brown eyes will be learning to read, and blue eyes will be starting high school (a year early.) Can't even wrap my head around that yet. But I don't have to. The next 8 weeks or so, I'm just going to concentrate on relaxation and showing the boys a good summer. Swimming, movie watching, Wii playing, fishing, field trips and book reading. Yeah!!! I love summer!!!